As always, welcome back to SeeingSophie!
AGAIN, sorry for being a bit MIA but I’ve had my trial exams and everything is a little bit crazy at the moment. I’ve got my last one on Monday and then I’m free until HSC though, so hopefully I can be uploading a bit more often!!
Today I’m going to follow up from my Part 1 of Aesthetic Self Improvement, which you can find here.
My first post was all about how I found makeup when I left school, and how I used it to make myself feel more confident and sure of myself, but how I’m also much more comfortable in my skin than I was previously.
Today’s post is about physical activity, and how I’ve used it to also make me feel less self conscious about how I look.
As teenagers grow, they grow through a very special stage that everybody develops in a different way, and this is called ‘puberty.’
This is a quote by my mother which was the introduction to possibly the most awkward conversation I’ve ever, and will ever, have. But despite how MORTALLY in-depth my mother went with that conversation, she missed out on some really important topics.
As you grow, and especially females, its common that changes are sudden and unexpected and completely not what you expected. Your hips widen, and your breasts grow, and your butt fills out and you know what you’re often left with?
It’s more commonly seen in the media now about ‘loving your stretch marks,’ but when I was 15-16 y/o, it was such a taboo subject, and I thought I was the only one, and I thought I was disgusting, to say the least. Not only that, but I had invasive knee surgery that kept me off my right leg for months, resulting in a massive loss of muscle mass. When I did get back on my feet, that all came back very quickly and so my right thigh also has these ‘disgusting’ scars.
I wouldn’t leave the house in shorts, or any clothing that would reveal my scars because I was so embarrassed that people would see me as ‘fat’ or ‘unhealthy’ and I was incredibly self conscious about what people thought of me.
Earlier this year, I started going to the gym to try and battle this and become skinny and what I thought was the ideal body type.
Now let me just say this: I really don’t mind going to the gym.
I’m in a lovely situation where my gym happens to have an olympic sized swimming pool, which is bloody fantastic because I love to swim. I use swimming as a reward, so I go to the gym and finish up in the pool once I’ve finished my work out.
There’s 3 things I’ve learnt since becoming a regular at my gym:
Stretch marks don’t just go away
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with them
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with me
Yes, my stretch marks are now almost invisible and blend into my skin, they’re still there, and I know they’re still there, but I’m comfortable with that knowledge.
I still go to the gym regularly, but it’s no longer because I want to alter my body to something that could be featured in a magazine. I mainly go to the gym as stress relief when I’m feeling quite wound up, and also because I needed to build a healthier lifestyle for myself.
Since joining, I’m definitely more confident in how I look, and my body has changed here and there, but my body shape is never going to change. I’m never going to lose my broad shoulders, or my thick thighs and arms, and you know what?
There’s no problem with that.
I’m finally in a place where I’m actually happy with my lifestyle, how I look, and how I feel. As I said in the previous post, makeup definitely helps with my self esteem because it makes me feel better about how I look. Similar to that, going to the gym makes me feel more comfortable in my own skin, as well as providing me with a healthy form of stress relief when life is getting a bit too much.
None of you should degrade yourselves because of imperfections, you should just try and accept they’re there, and move on. You’ll feel happier, and people won’t even look twice. I can guarantee that most of the time, you’re making a mountain out of a molehill, and nobody is even looking twice at something that you think is completely obvious.
What do you do to make yourself feel better, as stress relief or confidence? Let me know in the comments below and see if anybody else does the same as you!
Thanks again for reading, they’ll be another post up later this week 🙂